To start, we get Bray Wyatt v Roman Reigns for a spot in the Elimination Chamber. And actually, a pretty good match for these two. OF COURSE, Roman won because it’s all but confirmed he’s going to Mania, but Bray looked as good as he did a year ago. Once the obvious has been gotten out of the way, Matt Hardy delivered a Twist of Fate to Wyatt. If recent reports are to be believed, Matt has gotten the rights to the entire Broken Universe. This includes Broken Matt, Jeff’s character Brother Nero, and all the others bits that come with it. There’s even rumblings that Matt’s wife Reby could appear. So maybe so does Sister Abigail at last??? It could be amazing if they do it properly, but this is WWEland, so it will be a massive fuck up.
Balor and Anderson v The Revival. Basically, they have no idea what to do with Balor Club at the moment (bring in SAniTY Im begging you) and The Revival are still too small time despite being two time Tag Team Champs in NXT. I hope The Revival aren’t just there to make other teams look good. They need their time at the top.
Cruiserweight tag match now. Cedric Alexander and Mustafa Ali v Tony Neese and Drew Gulak. With Drake Maverick (Rockstar Spud to us) the new 205live GM at ringside. Only one thing to note here, Roderick Strong is to be part of the cruiserweights. GODDAMN IT WWE he’s better than that. I’m guessing now anyone in NXT below 200 pounds is going to the cruiserweights. This means Johnny Gargano, Aleister Black, Tomasso Chiampa, anyone good essentially.
We have a women’s Elimination Chamber match at……Elimination Chamber. Bliss v Bayley v Mandy Rose v Mickie James v Sonya Deville v Sasha Banks. Why Mandy and Sonya are there, I dunno. But it would seem its a push for Bliss v Jax at Mania, with many reporting Asuka will challenge Charlotte. Which is probably better because as much as I worship Bliss the goddess, theres no way shes beating Asuka. Charlotte stands a more equal chance, even though Asuka will win.
Bayley v Asuka. I was hoping this would be like their classics in NXT. To her credit, this was the best I’ve seen Bayley for a long time now. Asuka looks a bit more fallible the last couple of weeks, which is good in the long run. Setting up a bit of a rivalry for Bayley and Sasha too, which we’ve been waiting on for a long time.
The Miz v Apollo Crews in another Chamber qualifier. And a clean win for The Miz. It was another highlight reel for Crews, showing off his ridiculous athletisism. But yes Miz. Ideally, I’d like to see him win the Chamber match. That ain’t happening though. Fucking Reigns.
What should have been Rollins and Jordan v The Bar is now Rollins and Roman poxy Reigns v The Bar. Jordan had a neck injury so couldn’t compete. We got Reigns instead, the lesser of two evils. Thankfully, The Bar retained. I would imagine Jordan v Rollins at Elimination Chamber, Jordan goes heel. And likely sucks at it.
A Nia Jax vignette. They’re pushing her. She beat a local jobber with ease. It’s about damn time they pulled the trigger on Jax running the division.
Sonya Deville v Mickie James. First, its always nice to see Paige, it’s a shame it looks like she’s done in ring. Second, I’m a bit of a Sonya fan. She’s still not the best in the ring, but she’s got the tools. I think Mandy Rose looks better than she wrestles personally, but they need to go on their own. After, Rose and Deville attacked Mickie and she was saved by…..Alexa? Dunno. Its the start of something, likely Jax calling her out on it.
Elias v Cena v BRRAAAUUUNNN. The winner enters the chamber 6th. So of course the winner was….ELIAS! Which actually doesn’t mean anything in the long run, but he has a victory over Cena and Strowman, so there’s something he can sing about. Strowman delivered about 3000 powerslams after the match, egged on by the Universe because we love seeing Strowman deliver powerslams. He’ll be the last man defeated by Roman. Damn it.
Shane O Mac starts us off, quickly joined by Daniel Bryan. Shane has a gripe with Owens and Zayn battling for the WWE Title. Shane and Daniel have been at loggerheads recently, possibly to give Daniel an out should he decide to quit and go to the indie scene, where he undoubtedly would conquer wherever he goes. Cue AJ Styles, telling both to stay the hell out of the way tonight. He tells the truth, as noone really cares about their differences.
Liv Morgan v Charlotte Flair. It was…..a match. Ruby and Sarahgot involved, ejected, Flair won. Liv was actually pretty good tonight, if they ever went on their own, she’s the one I’d put my money on to be champ first.
Bludgeon Brothers v local jobbers. Harper and Rowan pretty much killed them. Title shot at Fastlane I’d imagine. As dominating as BB have been, they’ve yet to face any real team.
Now for the Smackdown top 10. Obviously AJ #1. But Tye Dillinger in 10? Something smells fishy already.
Rusev v Bobby Roode in a U.S. title match. And its still ridiculous how popular the whole Rusev Day thing is. And Roode looks so, so proud to be champ. That’s what I love about him. He won aswell which is nice, but then another RKO outta freaking nowhere! I can’t understand what this is all about, except to cement some sort of rivalry going into Mania. We’ve got a few more weeks to go, so I’m guessing someone will get to him first. Maybe Baron Corbin would be my guess.
Bengable v The Ascension. And still, literally noone cares about Bengable. The Ascension are criminally under utilised, and much better than this match would suggest.
Owens v Zayn. This was actually a far better match than it had any right to be. That was until Zayn started on Styles and the whole match got thrown out. So its now a triple threat at Fastlane. Dunno why we’re still doing this unless we get Zayn v Owens CCCXVII at Mania, as there’s no way Styles is losing until then.
We kick off with the tag champs Undisputed Era defending against SAniTY. Or we should, but SAniTY attacked before the bell. Cue Regal, who decides on a 6man tornado tag for the main event. YES REGAL! Im assuming SAniTY are on their way to the main roster, so this could be their swansong.
Heavy Machinery v Sabbetelli and Moss. And OH MY GOD TINO AND RIDDICK ARE IMPLODING AND nobody cares. Otis Dosevitch(?) has no right to be doing the worm but does anyway and its ridiculously amazing to see. With AoP and SAniTY dissapearing soon, NXT need some new tag teams. Fish and O’Rielly, TM61, Heavy Machinery and Street Profits are really all they have, with more teams needing MUCH more development.
Johnny Gargano got heated in a promo with Andrade Cien Almas, and agreed to a Championship match with a stipulation- if he loses, he leaves NXT. This is a way to get either Almas or Gargano onto the main roster. Hopefully Gargano doesn’t go to 205 live though. Its ruined so much good, although it should be noted Triple H is now in charge rather than Vince, so that’s why it’s been better in recent weeks.
Bianca Belair v local jobber. Beat her in two moves. I love Belair. She’s such a breath of fresh air right now, it’s a shame she’s only having a match once a month (TV wise, they film about 4 or 5 episodes in a block) but with a bit more ring time, a future NXT womans champ to be sure.
SAniTY v Undisputed Era. This was a main event worthy of any PPV. Killian Dain was awesome as ever, I would say he’s the one most likely to succeed if they ever went their seperate ways. Wolff is criminally underrated, and Eric Young, even though he can still go, has been around for a good long while now. UE are going to be around for a while, with Fish and O’Rielly being either Raw or Smackdown tag champs in the next couple of years, and ADAM COLE BAYBAY reckon being a Ziggler or Miz type; he’s not exactly world champ material YET, but a few US or IC title reigns definately.